I am interested in the next program, LIFE WITHOUT LIMITS, as I feel it would be beneficial in the near future. Thank you so much for helping me and so many others.
Sincerely, Michael, Alberta, CN"

I am currently struggling with a growth spurt. I'm taking college courses part-time, and I'm an officer in the Honor Society on campus! I'm figuring out something about these honor students: they're creative, they're intelligent, they're sensitive, they're somewhat compulsive---just like me! These days it's all I can do not to catch their anxiety! And I'm just fresh off the program (Attacking Anxiety) last month!

...I ended up being moderator of a meeting to "air grievances." I think I did real well for a person who scored a 56 on her diagnostic test. I remembered what Lucinda said about angry people wanting attention, and made sure that everybody felt heard and understood. By the end, people were smiling...

...I had two tests, an executive board meeting and men with tools all over my house! (Plumbing crisis.) Even with every room in my house either emptied or full of furniture, I can tell I'm not as bad a I used to be. I know that it's not some dread disease making my heart pound at night. I know that it's not the painter, or the honor students, or my husband, or my kids, or my ailing father. It's me--and the way I think. It's the way I think that everything depends on me, and the pressure that I put on myself. The way I expect everything I do to be done yesterday, and to be done perfectly. It's the deadlines I put on myself to get over this, and to get the weight off. I wouldn't treat anybody else this way, or put up with it from anybody else, either.

I know that I need to get a good night's sleep. I need to let things unfold...It's so ironic that in an apathetic world, there are people like us who care too much, and then we burn out and become ineffective. I will last longer as a student, an honor society member and as an officer, if I can take it all in stride. Less affected, and more effective: I think I'll have it tattooed on my arm.

Worrying about them is not helping them. Trying to fix it for them is not helping them. Taking it all on myself is not helping them to take responsibility. (Just writing those words is helpful.) Trying to eat myself into feeling better is only giving me more to worry about, and getting mad at myself for the backslide is not helpful, either.

The fact is, I'm going to have these growth spurts...And while I'm having this Growth Spurt, I'm learning what I need to work on...I walked into a Christmas store in the mall, and I didn't start hyperventilating...I just enjoyed the pretty decorations, listened to the music, and walked out...And the Halloween candy-I still have it. It's still sealed. Even with the Growth Spurt, I've had the sense to leave chocolate (my drug of choice) alone. It's things like that that let me know I'm not back at square one. I have learned too much to ever go back again. I'm learning to take care of myself, slow down, and take it a day at a time. Thank you, Lora, CA"

* . * . *

As a husband for over five years and the co-owner and president of a family business...I would like to thank you for all your help. I completed ATTACKING ANXIETY, one year ago and have had many VICTORIES over anxiety now that I have adopted many of your coping skills, techniques and life-style changes.

At thirty I found myself in the grips of anxiety, constantly living in the past and the future. I was truly a wreck on the inside. I was NEVER able to relax and my outlook on the future was extremely grim. Perhaps the scariest symptom I had were those incidence of bewilderment, I thought I was going crazy!...

Your series of tapes have been a tremendous help to me personally and professionally. I'm simply a stronger, more together, effective husband and business owner which has had tremendous rewards. My wife and I are expecting our first child..."

update: "...The past six weeks have been quite a blur, ever since our healthy baby boy was born. Parker, our first, is really keeping us on our toes!...The ATTACKING ANXIETY program played a major part in his being here!

I wish you all continued success with the program!" Mike SC

*.*.*

"My world was spinning with anxiety....I want to share my story with all of you who suffer...let you know that if you seek help, you can be rid of the fear, sadness, terror, depression, anger and the thousands of other hopeless emotions you face in living with anxiety. I found help through the Midwest Center and the incredible audio cassette program, Attacking Anxiety. If it helped ease my constant battle with worry, believe me, it will help you.

I am a twenty-four year old intelligent woman who is soon to be married...I suffered from anxiety attacks on and off for years but had no idea that was what I had. I used to commute to another city by bus in my late teens, and would want to die when stuck on that bus in rush hour traffic for more than an hour. I needed to run! This feeling came and went and I simply ignored t all. I figured it would all pass as I grew older. Well, it didn't...

(After the loss of a significant family member)...My life exploded and anxiety took over...We purchased the Attacking Anxiety course and I began it immediately. After two weeks I began to notice changes in myself. My fiancée' noticed the changes before I did. We listened to the relaxation tapes together, and our relationship grew as I got better. He constantly said how proud he was, and for the first time in a long time, I felt good.

It is now four months away from my wedding. I won't lie and say life is perfect. It is far from that. I still have fears and at times feel overwhelmed. But I know how to handle it. I haven't had a panic attack in months, and when I do get the feelings of starting one, I almost smile and think, "Whatever." "I can deal with this! Attack me- I dare you!" And the feelings go away.

I am writing in regard to your most recent ATTACKING ANXIETY program on television. I am interested in the reference cards that summarize the main ideas of each tape. These seem like they would be an invaluable asset to the original program...

I love this program and don't ever want to imagine how miserable my life would have been if I had not ordered it. I also have Lucinda's book, FROM PANIC TO POWER, I reread it often. The program and the book have become my anchors when my life is in real turmoil.

I called the help line...your advice was to deal with any feelings of panic where I was and not to go home where I would feel "safe." This was a couple of months ago. At the time understood but couldn't do it. I thought a lot about that piece of advice and tried it. I took a ride with my husband (a short one) to a new area, determined to face any fear head on.

Instead of waiting anxiously for an attack, I almost hoped one would happen because I wasn't going to run. Well, the ride went smoothly - I was fine. But more than that, I feel freer now than I have in years. I don't feel as trapped and confined to my house because I know I can go anywhere and face any feelings of fear I might have. I am also trying to keep in mind that I may have setbacks and this process is going to take time (Hard to do!)

Well, I just wanted to thank you so much for the great advice that day I was feeling so low. At the time I understood it - now I believe it. Thanks again, Patti"

* . * . *

I'm enjoying the challenge of doing things that previously I never would have attempted. Recently completed construction of and moved into a beautiful new home. It's a dream come true. I've also completed the State Board application process for Professional Engineers and passed the initial exams. I've changed jobs and am earning considerably higher income. I don't want to give the impression that things are perfect. They are not. The difference is that I'm not expecting them to be and I'm not looking for anyone's approval. This in itself is a gigantic burden lifted. All of these things and more were out there in "afraid-to-try-land," before LIFE WITHOUT LIMITS. The most exciting thing is that this is only the beginning. Endless possibilities lie ahead.

Something I like particularly well is your idea that we all have the power to lift someone's spirit with a simple comment, smile or gesture. I hope in some way that this letter lifts your spirit and you continue to produce such uplifting material. Jeff OH"

...I commit each day's activity to God and then I thank Him for His help throughout that activity. For example: When I set out driving somewhere I ask God to fill me with His peace and calm to protect me from harm as I drive. Then as I am driving I say aloud or to myself, "Thank you God that I am filled with your peace. I love to drive. Thank you for protecting me from danger, for helping me to be a careful and responsible driver. "I find I can't be worried when I am thanking God!

I pace myself throughout the day so as not to hurry. I rest. I exercise and plan what I eat and drink carefully. I go back to the weekly blue cards for reminders of daily living habits.

My belief in God was strong, so whatever I was suffering from was not a punishment from God as I had thought. I was guilt ridden but with your help I began to realize that God is the author of my life and He loves me just the way I am, so what I needed to do was befriend myself, to love myself.

This (experience) reminded me of Lucinda's ski story from the tapes. I know that in the past my weird body feelings would cause a panic attack but this time I soothed myself into thinking that these same anxiety type feelings meant I was doing the yoga correctly!!!

Tomorrow I will get on the highway...your book will be in my lap, with the Lord in my heart and His angels guarding the car. And as you say, "I'm not scared; I'm excited."

ALL ABOUT GROWTH

"Dear Midwest,

I have been putting myself to the test about my anxiety lately...I am 35 and returned to school after a series of job losses and now money is real tight. I am coping the best way that I can.

The program is still working its' magic. Last week I had a very difficult time but I seemed to have broken through some real challenges...One day I questioned my ability to function. Right then and there I stopped myself and said, "All right what is wrong - what is going on?" It was then I realized that I was very very angry. The next question that I had was, "OK, what can you do about it? In this case nothing."

I broke through the anger and said that I would not let my emotions control the situations by making myself in a "frozen like state." I got through this and I figure I can get through some more. But I am starting to think that maybe my panic attacks are really a mask for something else. Fore instance, I am having a difficult time in a living situation. The other day I had a panic attack coming home. Makes sense to me.

...people don't like the new me. And there are some that I am finding never did. Which is OK too...I am seeing that they are not good for me either. What this program and my prayers have taught me is that I have to do the best with what I am dealt. And right now I am dealt a situation that is difficult. I am practicing not being so hard on myself and not letting others be hard on me.

My self confidence has skyrocketed since being in the program. I am still working on improvement. Like one minister said, "I have got a ways to go, but thank God I am not where I used to be."

When I first started the program the thought of public speaking would make me sick. Now I kind of like it. As long as I know what I am talking about I don't feel bad about it.

I really think I am just plain tired. A friend of mine once said, "If I had to go through what you have over the past few years they would have been hauling me out on a stretcher." I felt comforted.

I take accounting class at night; one night during a break I found myself making the classroom my comfort zone. I felt if I walked out of there I should get scared going out to the snack machines. Then I realized I am not scared - I am plain tired. It takes me an hour on a bus after work to get to school. I have got to realize I only have so much energy.

One day I had a difficult time forcing myself to go to work. I said, "My anxiety is too high." Then I thought what is the difference if I stay in bed due to anxiety or go to work? Either way I will feel this way. And this is not a life threatening feeling. By the time I got to work I was fine. Slowly I am coping with the challenges and rewards of getting through...I have come a long way." Andrea, MI

(One week later Andrea reported the following: )

I wrote last week about how tired I have been. I now think I must have been gearing up for some kind of breakthrough. Yesterday I went through a similar problem as I was on my way to school on the bus, an hour ride both ways. I got super tired and said, "I don't think I can make it." Something came over me and I started writing in my notebook things that I can be thankful for and positive things. The feelings of not being able to cope disappeared.

Then when I got off the bus I started walking in the building and this overwhelming thought came over me. It was like someone was saying, "Andrea, you have got to start forgiving people. It was out of the blue. (I think maybe all my anxiety homework is starting to sink in.) I also decided that because of all the mental work I do all day, I must get out and exercise.

I believe some of my anger has been justified- a normal reaction. The thing I have realized is that holding on to grudges, still being mad over something that is over, or unfair...holding on hurts. It keeps it going...and has affected my overall quality of life...it creates a bondage and you actually become attached to the situation...

...by no means am I saying that I deserved the things that happened to me. I have just decided that if someone is mean to me they can live with their behavior... I have grown up quite a bit." Andrea

* . * . *

Dear Andrea, Thanks for sharing your growth spurts. Your insights will help others. Keep up the good work.

Instead of my usual personal letter, I've decided to answer one of the many, many letters we receive regarding scary, obsessive thoughts, since this is
such a frightening symptom for so many.

"Dear Lucinda, My growth spurt started when I kept have obsessive scary thoughts. I have had them before an managed to get past them...Recently...one thought just hit rock bottom for me and for some reason I just cannot seem to let go. I feel so alone and afraid that if I keep going on this way I might just lose my family...

...I have suffered on and off with anxiety, and it is like apart of me. My biggest fear is I don't know what it's like to be normal again since I've been this way for two months now...would I like being normal if I overcame this anxiety? ...I am so confused and feel trapped in my thoughts. I try to think positive thoughts but somehow I seem to always fail. ...have tried medications...so sensitive I get side effects...when I hear someone has something wrong with them, I automatically think I'm the same way. ...some avoidance behaviors...windows closed I think I cannot breathe...sleeplessness...Sincerely, C.C." (condensed from three pages of ongoing obsessive thoughts)

Dear C.C.,

I have to tell you that your letter was one of those powerful ones that took me back in time to when I was severely anxious and obsessive. Your concern is your obsessive thinking. You are concerned that you will not be comfortable with the new, less anxious you, therefore you subconsciously keep yourself anxious because it is more familiar. You are now obsessing about your obsessive thinking. You mentioned that you watched a woman on TV talk about her anorexia and it scared you. You fear: ending up living with your anxiety because you don't know how to live without it. Then you went on to talk about a friend who suffers with anxiety and you described her feelings and said you hope you don't end up like her.

Let me begin by saying that we are very, very sensitive to other people and their particular problems. I remember reading about people who had various problems with other psychological concerns and it seemed I could relate to all of them. I would read about someone with Manic Depressive Disorder or Multiple Personality Disorder and I would focus on what I read for days, dissecting it, re-thinking it...obsessing about it. I would ruin my day, my week, and fill myself with fear, that is, until I found another scary thought to transfer my energy to, which was usually something about my health or my sanity.

It is important to remember that you are an obsessive, creative thinker and that is not all bad. What is bad, is giving your negative, scary thoughts any power. They only have power if you let them and the only power they have is to make you feel more anxious. Remember most of these thoughts aren't even true! I certainly was not suffering with Personality Disorder and you are not going to keep yourself anxious because it feels more familiar...or you wouldn't have written and asked for help. Your true desire is to find solutions to your style of negative thinking.

Here is a 4 step plan of action to deal with your scary thoughts that worked and still works for me in an obsessive episode:

~Recognize that you are obsessing and that you are probably tired or trying to distract yourself from something else going on in your life.

~Immediately begin to reassure yourself with positive replacement dialogue that you are just over reacting and these thoughts are not realistic. Do not give them any value which gives them no power.

~Get focused on something or someone else. Call a friend and talk about their life. Play with your kids, read a positive book, listen to your tapes, but change your focus - get it away from you. Get out and get involved in the world.

~Go to a spiritual place to find some peace of mind through prayer, meditation and the relaxation tape.

In your letter you mentioned that you tried medication but you didn't like it and that you are so sensitive that you experienced side effects. You must realize that almost everyone feels side effects with these types of medications although they are not always the same. Medications are a wonderful resource for someone who just can't seem to get control of the ruminating, obsessive thoughts. Anti depressants can be extremely helpful in controlling obsessive thoughts. Don't be afraid to consider this alternative if you can't do it on your own. Talk with your doctor. You need to give the medication at least 30 days to see results. I understand your concern about taking medications but I would rather take a medication than feel totally obsessed with scary thoughts. Once you gain control of your thoughts and use the ATTACKING ANXIETY skills, you will more than likely be able to go off the medications anyway.

C.C., you are too focused on yourself. You need to do something positive with your creative energy. Write, work, volunteer. Get out and start living life in spite of the thoughts. If you sit there and wait to start living - when the thoughts go away - you are putting the cart before the horse. The thoughts will dissipate when you fill your time and get distracted. If you have time on your hands you will spend it worrying and obsessing, so it is better to get busy.

Finally, remember to stay grateful. This is anxiety, it is not terminal! You can overcome it; I did. But it does take time, patience and constant effort. It does get easier as time goes by. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are not alone, there are millions of people walking this path with you. Stop looking for goblins and monsters and start looking for rainbows and sunshine...They're out there, waiting for you just beyond the clouds. The clouds go away when you "let go" of the scary thoughts and the fear. Just let it go. Trust yourself, trust God. Trust your new skills.

Midwest Center for Stress and Anxiety
106 N. Church Street / PO Box 205
Oak Harbor, Ohio 43449
800 511-6896 Toll Free
(419) 898-0669 Fax
(419) 898-4357

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